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Showing posts from November, 2023

Energy in search of expression

  What’s a good starting point? Something has built up inside me & needs to get out But I don’t know what it’s called This build up of volatile energy It’s a windy day & the wind jackhammers my being Like a mountain being mined I feel the machines & fly-in fly-out workers talkin trash inside me Hating the mountain Belittling it Abusing it Reminding themselves “Just think of the cash” To make it easier for them to desecrate, to rape Bad faith.     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

Outwards never inwards

  Outwards never inwards   I understand why people in the current era prefer to look outwards than inwards: it is less confronting. Also, it is easier. As Toni Morrison points out, the making of peace requires extremely attentive, patient & nuanced communication & thought processes, whereas the war mentality of black & white is easy. It can be done with a simple slogan. Peace & its making is a slow process. War is quick to pick. Peace & its making invites an openness to the future. War making is closed & has no time for anything other than conflict. We live in a simplistic age. Divorce rates have sky rocketed & couples are often unwilling to seek support for their tensions. People simply walk away. & yet when it comes to the body & diets & fitness regimes directed towards self-beautifying, people seek assistance & show great commitment. The current fashion for "Politics" is similar. Not to diminish the suff

Man’s best friend indeed

  Man’s best friend indeed   Depressed & lonely Every phonecall rings out My ex-wife took my community away & now I’m a foreigner Starting from scratch I’m not interested in small talk I’m on the point of tears relentlessly My dogs run out excited Calling for a walk I say “no” they return back up the house dejectedly Watching a film featuring an emotional donkey I read the signs & press pause Put on my shoes & say “come on” We walk out into the setting sun A healing walk into the night The dogs alert & the air is thrilling The dogs know what’s best for me When I need to cuddle them When we need to share a walk They know what I need better than anyone Man’s best friend indeed.     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

Full moon fever

 Full moon fever The dogs absorb A good deal of the full moon fever Us lunatics suffer from So much more pleasant with a pack of hounds on your side Sleeping? Forget it  It’s too exciting being awake We’re charged & you guys are sedentary wowsers Why does our society Not have celebrations For each full moon So we can share the ecstasy? That’s right: Your program Is pornographic onanism  Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

Cedell Davis

  Cedell Davis (After seeing Handel’s Messiah in English) “Some people you can’t explain nothin to em. They see it with their own eyes But they still don’t get it”   Maybe the words aren’t an exact quote Anymore than his guitar plays a tuned note But I love his music & philosophy.    Arkansas born & bred. 1933 Typhoid malaria got his legs. 1936 Polio got his arms. When a gunman hit a bar he was playing he was trampled by a crowd His movement is extremely limited.   But he still plays kick ass blues. My favourite a lot of the time.   To the Western Ear raised on Western tuning & electronic tuners, it sounds ‘out of tune.’ When I was younger, my classically trained brother explained relative pitch. It stuck.   In a universe of relativity of sound waves the odder the better. The more resonant the stronger.   Cedell plays clear.   Art is about communication.   “If you like fat women” & you’re anywhere near Arkansas,

The government of the tongue

  The government of the tongue (After Seamus Heaney)   I do not stand for anybody Unless greeting a friend Or if I’m on trial I do not swear on the Bible My word is good enough I do not need accoutrements I’m a man of the land, sea & sky Yes I & the stars in the sky The love in your heart & an ear that is fair A hand to help someone in need & the government of the tongue xx     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

Some days

  Some days in my mental cycle Which is irregular  Like a swallow’s circles I feel cut off from my being Like I’m watching myself exist But feeling a kind of death A waning of power The only thing that gives me comfort tonight Is the lone star In the sometimes parting blanket of grey It once died Perhaps it is still living But it shines Despite its faded glory We children of the stars Radiate a light Despite our minds Even when depressed We can still shine for others & navigate them through the storm. Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

Perfection

  Perfection   “Perfection is the enemy of the good” – (French Proverb)   A person may do a lot of good But of course They will do some bad,   But a Cost-Benefit Analysis   (Which is what politics & civics & most judgements are in fact Before Ideology obscures things)   Is the only guide To approve or reject.   The other thing:   Some might really fuck up But during the rest of their lives Having learned & sought to change their ways Redeem themselves.   The 2 examples Have been forgotten   By an increasingly Litigious culture   (puritanical also - see 'cancel culture')   Where people sue good people Who make an error (Which is what humans make)   Not maliciously An error made in good faith.   The question is: What is it that the plaintiff wants?   An apology To ruin the life of a person who sought to help them To lay blame for their discontent on someone Or money?   Does the griev

I’m not writing about

  I’m not writing about   I’m not writing about The legally sanctioned non-disclosure agreements We are coerced into signing To be allowed to work In order to eat (As if we're all employed in central intelligence) & how counter to a functioning democracy They are To be muzzled about the majority of our lives & the basis of our whole society/economy The anti-democratic marriage of Corporations & the State The government punishes "whistleblowers"  stratospherically People in our country are hostile to freedom of speech & come down upon anyone who thinks differently (blasphemy in a supposedly secular society?!) & are indifferent to the Court's outrageous punishments for breaking this 'law' (taboo?) So why should I  be bothered?   --   A writer today must stick to the issues Their phone tells them to Stick to nice topics like cultural studies/Pop culture Celebrities To have a Yay! Or Boo! Reaction at Not to prompt

Everyday shame

  Everyday shame (for Toni Morrison) Everyday shame At different stages in my life Disgusting earworms have entered my being At secondary school it was the racist & homophobic taunts They got stuck in me like ocean plastic getting caught in fishes’ bellies They’ve never completely left Despite my love of common humanity Despite my love of people designated as “Other” Despite the fact that "diverse" families have adopted me   These earworms died down there for a while But were chronically refreshed during my years in South London Where the culture was balanced on a knife's edge These slurs against those deemed “different” Have had a marketing makeover & it's more subtle now You don't hear those old slurs as often But I hear them under people's breaths & I see them in their eyes Recently I was speaking with an Indigenous elder It was as if he was entering my soul He heard those taunts unspoken & I heard him hearing

Block

  Block   It was during 2004 When going for a walk with my housemate, A culturally Jamaican (Australian), Now mentor & deepest friend,   I was talking about Reggae bass lines   & Richard said to me “Don’t worry about the bass parts, Listen to the lyrics!”   I started to pay more attention to the words & heard great truths   & realized we Aussies Don’t often pay attention To the lyrics   We’re not great listeners on the whole,   We want the escapism That a cursory experience of music can provide   We don’t really want to engage With the song.   Fast forwards a few years & playing gigs   & people chatting through What’s for them Background music   A way of avoiding silence & its meditations   Air conditioning really.   --   Part of the denial we Aussies live in/under Is this.   That conditions exist for our Comfort called “pleasure.”   We don’t look too deeply.

Damn Right I Got The Blues

  Damn Right I Got The Blues (After Buddy Guy) Damn Right I Got The Blues. Big Johnny Johnson was also known as ‘The Oil Man’. He worked hard delivering Oil during the day, showered, dressed & went onto his gigs at night. I’ve always related to that story, coz I was more creative when I worked. Like you got to get the rhythm of the Grind in order to sing a true song. You gotta learn the voice of the people in order to find Heaven. The Immanent & the Transcendent joined. Recently I haven’t been working & my art has disappeared up its own arse. Spending a week talking about my shame & not a brass razoo. History keeps tickin & we all got scars. The love of my life had big black curly hair. 11 years together. After breakup she started straightening her hair. We still talk a lot but we’re split. I thought she was me & she still is. & the rupture has cut me in 2. I don’t know who I am. I don’t know where I’m from. I don’t know where I’m bound. Damn R

When they met

  When they met   (for Thomas Baxter)   “No tree, it is said, can grow to Heaven Unless its roots reach down to Hell” – C.G. Jung   When they met My mother Beatrice & my father Dante Everyone was in Hell   I can’t tell you how The details would never pass the censors So please suspend your judgement Only I get to write my autobiography   The wonderful achievement of my family Was their heroism To find Heaven there Heaven & Hell   One of the most difficult things Is sharing in a society That is under the illusion It is living in Purgatory   I love all my family like Life They are each heroic   I did not have a conventional life I was raised by giants Something our country hunts, cages & kills   I am in my 9 th life     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

A Difference between a psychosis and a vision

  A Difference between a psychosis and a vision. The former has a narrative the latter doesn’t. In short, the former speeds up time, the latter slows down time. In a vision one is watching oneself having the vision. In a psychosis one is unaware of this distinction. However, the 2 ‘episodes’ interrelate. Perhaps my psychosis was a necessary training for better understanding of my visions. For they make me more circumspect and doubtful and less gung ho. To borrow from the South African painter William Kentridge, in my recent vision which includes before and after and all my life a “defence of the uncertain.” The point if there is one, of a vision, is resonance. Which is transformation plus wisdom. In short Time. Of course the danger always lurks of another psychosis. With the help of my brilliant Psychiatrist, I have become trained, for want of a better word, in self managing. However I also need the help of my community. I am truly lucky to have supportive people around me. As for the