Mel From Melbourne - Music & Words

  Pygmalion Someone challenged me to write like I used to write before the rod entered my spine to walk me straight to the job that was going so I would I like champagne & caviar it’s beyond my budget but life is beyond my budget a little Lord Byron flows through her veins & she’s the only one for me ideology works today despite its nonsense-value perhaps because if we were straight up our pants would fall down my breath my breath he gasped but her sex felt like “god” & the painting was peeling like infinities on a wafer a lifer thought a snail a friend it was pleasant not rushing for once the songs ’ve stopped it said my dear you look a little blistered or is that pistons? The wherewithal was combatant like the moon & I swooned hence found out as non bona fide carrion for her lace that framed her spider inside her & then the men of the slogan shot automatically & rather only asked questions & offered nothing as to their mood swings after all they were p

The Dogs   The breeze comes out of the East But it’s blustery Nevertheless, I receive its commendation To rest & wait out the aftershocks   I’ve been running so long from everything All things emblazoned with Loss & Grief On the scent of nothing My hope is for a quiet turn   My friend the blackbird is observing me & I him Soon it appears The other dogs will be back with me   & we can feed & dream peacefully for a time I wait     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  Microscope Telescope   The current wave of ideological battles is tiresome. It ignores the brain and its relationship to the self and the human condition.   My Psychiatrist and I were discussing dopamine and how even that escapes the binary. There had been an earlier theory that a surplus of dopamine causes schizophrenia and a deficit causes Parkinson’s disease & yet cases have appeared with patients suffering from both (Anthony David, 2020). Nevertheless, people suffer & usually there is a mixture of the organic/genetic which is often complicated (requiring multidirectional therapies) & social/experiential (also requiring multidirectional therapies).   Anyone whose made a special friend will know that there’s something different about THAT person to their milieu. And that’s everybody. Something SPECIAL.   Nevertheless, the MACRO operates. Wars, Shitstems, Disfunctional Institutions, inequitable distributions of wealth, threats to the Nation and self from

  A Dream   I’m with King Charles III & I’m crucified on an ‘Irish cross’ (not a Celtic cross, kind of brambly) He lets me cut myself down We’re friends now I ask if I can keep the ‘commemorative “Finn” (which I think means 'Fenian') cushion which come with the crucifixions (The strings on the small Irish Harp design on the cushion looked more like prison bars) He hesitates a moment but assents “We don’t use these anymore” & that “Finn” to the English “Means the little Irish” I’m somewhat shaken by the whole experience But he offers me a scotch A nice one   ̶ An Islay one by the taste of it He is warm to me like a grandfather   After a while He has to go off with some of his aides & leaves me there   I am called over to the window by the procession of passersby outside An Eastern European pair of women a sk me if I’d like a sip of Advocaat Which I do Then they ask if they can have a sip of My (I guess “The” (as in &#

  Quiet souls  Quiet souls can be strong souls quiet can be deep small waves can have resonance just OWN your emotions don't judge others don't be closed off don't be passive aggressive with your minimalist gestures and responsivenesses shake the mountain Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  Met 2 great people from SW Qld I like strong people  Strong energy I like forthright people I like open people OPEN! Not the bullies who are violent but closed Anyway, It made me think of my best mates when I was a kid We probably all had fucked up childhoods but KINDA GOOD because REAL & so I loved the rough & tumble Kids generally sort things out When the Teachers back off Not always But you get the point Anyway, we got separated by Demographics The Middle Class vice got squeezed into my mind I hated it The others Like Jason, John, David, Brian went into the Working Class machine & the shitstem became divisive & divided Suspicion was introduced Spiritual differences read into manners I hate the class system We met at the caravan parks on our holidays & I loved it But on and on it went onto University & my peers & a lot of the brilliant one's weren't private school kids But you know It's a My Fair Lady Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Makeover s

  The Origins of the Binary    Wherein originates the binary. Is it in the inhale, the exhale Is it in the rise and fall The tides in and out Ambition and gravity Pleasure and pain Night and day Life and death?   Or is it purely linguistic  The structuring of the individual Legally as a unit? You are not me. I am not you. Subject. Object. Predicate. The Sentence.   Indigenous cultures speak of a group mind We have decided: a Conciliatory approach Based around conciliation: Unity Working through differences for the common good Not like the White Man’s adversarial legal model  Is it money then? The transactional My possessions, my property, not yours   & the language I speak  I’m speaking in the language of the Victors The dominators, the killers   The Colonial approach Was to attempt to destroy a culture’s strength To change it To weaken it   Does the binary then lie in Colonialism? Us and them  Reducing human life

  On Psychosis   To bang on about one’s mental health issues Could be potentially narcissistic I guess Unless it might mean also something to other survivors & perhaps shed an interesting light On the minds of those who aren’t With special regards to knowing & it’s twin: delusion.   The particular aspect I have never really gotten over Was the completely humiliating & core shaking revelation That during my psychosis my perception of things Was 180 degrees arse frontwards on certain  ‘certainties.’   It is very hard when one has been willing to die for them Note I say die & not kill Because the latter thought never occurred to me My focus during my psychosis & perhaps its dominant theme Was the immense suffering in the world With which I became existentially overwhelmed By my sole obsessive desire to bring about an easing of suffering. I was in no way malicious, quite the opposite Love for all life was driving me.   Dur

 Miles Davis’ ‘Aura’ album between 4.38 & 5.24am. (For Matt Nees) I had an experience where I didn’t have internet for 10 days so I wasn’t looking at much apart from the occasional picture in a book or just the world. I woke one morning before dawn & had but one lamplight or maybe first light had appeared. I put on the record & all I could see was the music. All was sound & it was all there was to any sense. It went beyond analysis. It was powerful & profound. Beyond words. Explaining the sacred is impossible. A scientist might call it a moment of synaesthesia I guess. But a poet would know that wouldn’t get very close to the ‘matter’.  It would merely be a written diagnosis. Communion is mystery not theology. Such things would happen spontaneously more frequently if we weren’t overwhelmed by visual media and our devices of distraction. & maybe if we weren’t so mechanisticly busy — running to the clock. If our senses could breathe. Published & Copyright Mala

  surrealism to sell accounting Rasta trumps Thanatos   The surrealist obsession with death Rastafari Livicates (wake up & LIVE) Root yourself in your corpse?: No (wo)Man! But in Universal organism/orgasm – the Universe – Life! ONE LOVE We ALL LINKED Whether the bullies kill/like it or no Fuck bullies   Aboriginal say, the ancients say: “You can take our life & liberty friend But you cannot buy our soul” (Kev Carmody say)     Tuesday 10 th October 2023, 3.48pm, Sunny, Spring, light breeze from the West   Space is infinite …In any embrace There is infinite space…   Intimacy is close & vast As is / Is as infinity   & pleasure mr bataille, mr magritte Is not cruel ronald macdonald, mr shell, macmammon adverstising hollywood   I & I say: LIFE JUSTICE WISDOM LOVE   HUMANITY ON THE ONE!   What the birds, the bees, the flowers, the trees, the rivers, the sky, the earth, the stars, the mountains, oceans, the

  Tinker   Mingus mingle Monk funk What is a sapphire doing?   You’re toast is cold But your yard is tender   --   Tinker     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  On Fear of One's Self   This one’s not as bad As fear of others   If we stop fighting with other people’s Opinions of us   & stick with enjoying ourselves & those who make us feel good   Then it’s good times.   I might be mad I might be deranged   As might you think you’re mad We might all be schizophrenic   & what we think is happening Is all an illusion   So what?   --   That is of course a conversation Limited to an Individualist paradigm   In cultures of groups souls Or group minds   Like pre-Colonial Indigenous peoples If what I’m led to believe is right   So my initial statement here Is contingent or reliant on Western Imperialist conditions of interrelationships   --   & there are other topics Far more important when viewed comparatively   Like food, clean water, shelter, access to medical assistance, Education, culture, community, freedom from war & persecution and

  19 & 20   Back when bookstores had Mountain ranges like caterpillars   I met Lorca   I was washing the dishes & he tapped me on the breast   In my blue matador ring   Tears blood quicksilver   It was a child’s birthday jelly Like frog in a pond.   Then I had to sleep & read the English Canon.   I woke up for a moment today In time for the firing squad   My charge:   ‘Play’.     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  Thoughts I had when I was 18 before I learned about poetry   Red cat Red cat Red cat on A green mat   Black cat Black Cat Black Cat on A white tree   Purple possum Purple possum Purple possum above A blue lake   Yellow spider Yellow spider Yellow spider laughing With an orange mouse   Journey into darkness darkness darkness You reach the first star   Journey around that planet that planet that planet Arrive at yourself   Lost in a mirror a mirror a mirror’s Reflection   You see the faces of Others Others Others   Journey into light You reach more & more & more stars     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  Vale John Mason   John was the first English teacher to believe in me I can’t tell you what that did to my self-efficacy Without it I might never have become a poet A man of such integrity & genuineness He encouraged & kindly questioned & did not enclose As my school world was so enclosed like a prison He opened the doors of perception & conception He excited my mind & made me believe I was important I was severely depressed when I reached him & he turned my spirit upwards A commitment to Justice & Reconciliation His early life in South Africa under Apartheid marked him forever He never gave up speaking out against Injustice I have lost a great teacher & friend     Rest In Power John.     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  What's with the act What's with the act Immanuel Kant? the Public & Private self separated Yes or "Si" concurs Mr Plato (hang on, he was was Greek! must have been thinking of the Popes?) So we end up lonely Because so few are honest about their fantasies & their private views They parrot the attitude (hat-he-chewed) of the Day & say G'day (much "safer") Fuck it's lonely though! No wonder people are all on their phones Being watched by the corporates & the Feds, America, China, Russia & Cyber criminals Much safer there eh? As for trusting people to trust our fellow people Us/Humanity: "Forget it!" Fuck it's lonely! Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

 Question: having never studied engineering but yunno, having lived experience of physics you know gravity & ageing/mortality  ie. having a body that moves and bears weight and generally stays connected to its parts & will eventually conk out I'm wondering in which unit do they teach in built obsolescence? Is it an undergraduate or the Masters course? An unsavory topic however, my new toilet brush is made from 2 pieces of plastic As we know 2 parts of plastic  do not remain joined for long you can't use a nail as you would for wood or welding as for metals The old toilet brushes came in one piece & they lasted till you didn't want them to  Is there a week in the built in obsolescence unit where they discuss the contemporary & cutting edge commercial engineering technique of making objects of multiple plastic parts for best return on investment for retail companies I think I could do quite well that week despite not having a particularly left hemispheric domi

  Assistants   It must nice for major rich artists to have assistants Allowing them for focus on ‘higher things’ Painting pretty pictures & then out to an expensive dinner with sycophants Sounds like a good lark & still take sole credit for the work I wonder what an ego trip like that is really like It might be fun afterall To have delusions of grandeur Oh to be a commercial artist To say nothing of import & get big time pay Alas I’m with Van Gogh Painting alone in the field struggling for food Still at least I have both ears Absinthe with wormwood is illegal & contemporary psych meds While approximations & imperfect Make it possible to live & create Oh & wait: & an audience (while small) for whom I am very grateful Thought I’m still not getting paid Nor getting laid Man those gallery chicks are generally really tasty! (haha)     Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2023.

  I feel dizzy all the time. I don’t think Lexapro is right for me. My anxiety is periodic due to a lot of trauma over the last 8 years (wife near death 3 times, carer for 8 years, death of mother, death of best friend, wife in hospital for 3 months last year requiring 2 brain operations which I had to give permission for, the death of my father, my wife and my separation, being in temporary housing (6 places) for 5 months, teaching on temporary contracts to teenage refugees) — my anxiety is periodic and not constant. Valium addresses flares which is what I suffer from. It’s what I need. But the PBS won’t support it. They fear it’s addictive. I don’t find it to be so. Again bureaucrats acting like they know more than Psychiatrists/doctors. Lexapro is for constant anxiety which I don’t suffer from. The government is pushing Lexapro. Money from the Pharmaceutical Companies? And stopping the use of Valium. I don’t feel anxious. I feel dizzy. I could work on Valium. I can’t on this shit. F