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24 hours later

 

24 hours later

 

You were suggested by a friend to sit with your pain. The rage & disconsolation you felt when the divorce agreement was finally complete. The feeling of betrayal, of someone quitting. But you know people these days chop & change a lot. The illusion of choices. Anyway, you’re not going to go into it here. The pain is today’s focus. The pain was so bad that you drank & the drinking made it worse. & so you worked out it hurt less to be sober & sit with it. Take a nap if you need. Really the more you sat with it, the more it dissolved & became the act of writing to Mozart Piano Concertos & you found that not only was there an easing of pain, there was indeed pleasure. You started to write indifferent to its literary standing & wrote primarily as therapy. You remembered doing art therapy classes & you noticed how the artists struggled to benefit from the therapy because they were too concerned with aesthetics, where you as a beginner just poured yourself into the doing caring nought whether it looked any good or not. Not a bad way to go about things. Schooling does it to us. The spirit of competition & we judge things by their results not by whether we learn anything. & so you sit with the pain & let go of controlling it & it’s starting to feel good, less than 24 hours after the pain was unbearable.

 

 

Published & Copyright Malachi Doyle 2024.

 

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